playswithworms: (Default)
Went to see it yesterday morning, fully expecting to be completely lost and confused and eye rolling, but that there'd be a few fun tidbits here and there and some robot eye candy, and I was not wrong!



Stuff I liked:
Young girl hero Izabella - she was fun, very minimal screen time.
Izabella's little robot buddy and its heroic taking out of the big-thing-that-exploded (as you may infer, I'd completely lost track of the plot 5 minutes in)- "you're small and you're ugly, they'll never see you coming!"
Baby Dinobots! That are tiny and growing and "starting to get their powers" so ha. Baby robot headcanon further supported! All three seconds of time they were in the movie.
Lennox! He was there! I have no idea what he was doing, and darnit why no robot interaction, these were his friends, right? But it was good to see him.
British!Mikaela - there was the usual luscious lips and skin tight dresses thing, but it didn't get too bad, and I thought the developing relationship with Cade avoided being eye-rolly. Also they gave her some practical waders for exploring the underwater spaceship, although those managed to be pretty form fitting as well. Interesting they brought up the whole "knights should be celibate" thing with Cade, too, and implied he'd been celibate since his wife died without doing something weird and eye-rolly about it? So that was nice.
Cogman the butler robot - was mostly fun, but sometimes...it just got weird.
Bee's true voice bringing Opt back to his senses - walked the close border of my cheesiness tolerance there, but didn't *quite* cross that line. Although I thought he ripped out the other voice module they tried to fix him with earlier so not sure how that worked?
Secret!Cybertronian Submarine (at least I think so? Again, sooooooo lost)
Space ship! And Cybertron bits falling all over the Earth or whatever it was doing.
The black guy didn't die, that was nice. They tried to give him some character but no one seemed to really care about him?



Stuff I didn't like:
Soooooooooooooo lost. What the what. As one review termed it, a "ludicrous mess." I expected it but it was even worse than I expected. It took me reading a review of the movie to realize that the 12 robot knights combined to turn into the three-headed dragon?
The constant relentless antagonism - every single interaction between every single sentient being it seemed like. Yell yell yell insult punch yell huff yell insult. I mean not everyone needs to get along all the time, but good lord. I think this was my least favorite thing about the whole movie - I had to literally shut my eyes and plug my ears and tune out because it just kept going and going.
Boy Michael Bay sure does love his "human bodies flying through the air in giant explosions" doesn't he? Gets old after awhile.
Killing of Izabella's big robot buddy right off the bat - I mean c'mon, let her show her mad repair skillz and then he could hang out recovering and they could do "a girl and her big robot buddy" fun bonding stuff? I mean, she had her little robot buddy, but we always get the boys and their big robot buddies all the time. I want Izabella and Optimus Prime's Amazing Road Trip With Bonus Baby Robot Hijinks.

Date: 2017-06-30 03:16 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] dragondancer5150
dragondancer5150: (Transformers - Sunny & Sides drunk)
Yeah, I gave up on the movies after the third one (really, gave up after the first but wanted to know what ALLLLLL my friends were talking about). Glad you were able to enjoy parts of it, though!

Date: 2017-07-02 03:22 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] dragondancer5150
dragondancer5150: (Default)
PAINFULLY TRUE sometimes I think fanfic authors come up with far better material than the professionals.

Date: 2017-06-30 03:19 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] sakon76
sakon76: (Default)
I gave up on Bayverse after movie 3 (which doesn't exist either in my personal headcanon). I quite literally said on the way out of the theater "Thank God I never have to see another Michael Bay movie ever again." But then he kept making more...

The fact that you couldn't follow TLK reaffirms that I made the right choice. But at least it sounds like it had some good stuff peppered in it to make up for being a tangled hot mess?

Date: 2017-06-30 05:05 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] madripoor_rose
madripoor_rose: milkweed beetle on a leaf (Default)
Nods, you have to go into these things realizing the plot is only a framework to hang the explosions on.

Keeping my fingers crossed for lots of Baby Dinobot fanfic to be the fandom response.

Date: 2017-06-30 09:11 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] raisedbymoogles
raisedbymoogles: (Default)
Well, a few good points is more good points than I was expecting. Still refusing to acknowledge its existence, but I can steal bits for future ficcage. :D

(An eighties-style road trip movie with Optimus Prime is honestly all I want out of life.)

Date: 2017-07-01 11:02 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] sabriel
sabriel: Naruto - We are Soldier We Stand or Die (Naruto - We are Soldier We Stand or Die)
I just wish they would take the franchise away from Michael Bay and give it to someone like Guillermo del Toro. Maybe then I'd finally give them my hard earned cash again.

Right!

Date: 2017-07-02 12:27 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] missmaryr
missmaryr: (Default)
Totally agree with you. I did watch the fourth movie and regretted wasting my money.

Date: 2017-07-03 04:12 am (UTC)From: [personal profile] tainry
tainry: (sunfish rocket by ?)
I was thinking I wanted to see it again to figure out if I could catch any more fun bits. Now I'm thinking I'll wait for the dvd. XD
I haven't felt the need to fic, either. No one I love died, for one thing, which would need fixing. And it was just such a huge mess...you'd need to write three stories to sort it out. the Goonies With Giant Robots, where Izzy is the main character and we don't even see Cade. The Viviane vs Quintessa story, which could encompass all the any technology sufficiently advanced is indistinguishable from magic stuff. And maybe then the Cade and Optimus desperate barn husbands reunited with Will as the other corner in the love triangle. Or maybe Bee is, idk.

And I? Have other fish to fry.

Izzy and Canopy and Sqweeks! :D
Baby robots!!! Indeed, and who spawned them, hmm? Are they all Grimlock's or did each of the dinobots bud off their own? ::cackles::
Mmmm yes it was good to see Lennox again! <3 Getting a little 'old wolf'-y, too! ::glees::
I liked Viviane too! It would have been good if the story had been more hers, but hey. And spunky enough to take a swing at Roddy with a polo mallet! :D (Roddy was adorable! I wish she had known about him a lot sooner - introductory conversations would have been fun and hilarious!)
Chaste knights! Diggin' it! ;DDDDDDD
THE SUBMARINE!!!!!!!!!!!!! <333333333333333333 She needs a name. She needs a name right now and she is one of the Waterbabies and Seaspray loves her yes he does!
OK, a lot of folks on tumblr enjoyed Cogman and I...didn't. C-3PO does fussy better and way less mean. Headmaster reference drop is ok sure.
Anthony Hopkins schooling Mark Wahlberg was fun, for the three seconds Hopkins wasn't being all tangential. I hope the actor was having fun? We don't need a coherent performance this is a Bay movie? I guess?
Bee's true voice bringing Optimus back! I'LL TAKE IT. One small bright thing. <3
CYBERTRON IS HERE TO GIVE EARTH A BIG HUG! I mean, visually it was p interesting? Someone has amazing gravitational powers I tell you what. And I don't know if she comes by them honestly or she STOLE them from, oh, someone, la la la...
Black guy didn't die! Amazing! And good! I just wish his character had been useful for, like, anything at all...
Yeah, all the snipping and sniping. Not funny, really, and not that fun either. Sigh.
Drift doing sword yoga was fun, though! ;D

Izabella and Optimus Prime's Amazing Road Trip With Bonus Baby Robot Hijinks
is definitely a great idea! <3

Date: 2017-07-04 08:52 pm (UTC)From: [personal profile] mewsing
mewsing: Optimus Prime sees what you did there (transformers)
I kinda got a kick out of how Bee lost his temper at the other voice box being "not my voice" and that was pretty funny. And Frank Welker voicing Megatron? FINALLY.

But yeah, plot holes big enough to drive Optimus Prime through. Scratch that. Plot holes big enough to teleport Cybertron through. Sheesh. It was nigh on impossible to feel sad about Canopy being killed because we didn't witness any interaction at all between him and Izzy, and that annoyed me. :/

At least Barricade didn't get killed...again. At least, I think he didn't. x_x

And the thing I have about all these movies: MOAR TRANSFORMERS PLZ, LESS HUMANS KTHNX

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